You're going to need munitions if you hope to survive.
And, although we do not condone violence (we just laugh at it when it happens), we just so happen to have a list of "office-friendly" firepower to help you beat Accounts Payable back to the 5th floor, where they belong.
For in-cubicle war, you'll need to set up a last-line of defense. A best bet is the $29.99 USB Missile Launcher. Control it from your computer so you don't have to get your hands "dirty." However, with only an 8-foot maximum range, it's good for close combat, but not for long range. For that, you're going to need something else.
A good, non-lethal choice is the $23.96 MegaZooka Air Gun. Blast your enemies with puffs of air from up to 20-feet away. Perfect for disheveling your enemy's hair. Accountants hate that.
When air isn't enough, $19.95 buys you Marshmallow Fun Company's Marshmallow Shooter. This pump-action, 20-round gat rockets mini-mallows up to 30-feet. Perfect for shooting at the known diabetics who are storming your office floor.
When things start getting weird, reach for this Chicken Chucker. Though it has a fairly short-range (about 15-feet), the surprise factor of this $4.99 chicken-throwing device cannot be ignored.
Lastly, bring the fight way over the top with the $19.99 Slingshot Animal Combo Pack. Just like the days of yore (at least, as I've seen in Monty Python's "Holy Grail") flying animals can make a great offense. Unleash six slingshot animals –- with realistic animal screams -- to finally win the war and show those accountants who's boss.
But remember, be gracious in victory. After all, the accountants still sign your paycheck.
Have a list of office-friendly arsenal you keep in your cube? Shoot us an e-mail and let us know your favorite office weaponry.