We guarantee that each of our rumors are pure, unchecked, un-sourced, and virtually fact-free speculations. Also: No high-fructose corn syrup. Apple to cut prices?GASP! My conspicuous consumption purchase is less status-symbol, now that the proles can afford one, too! (Also: My monocle has just fallen from my eye.) Tuvalu is sinking?Which, of course, means that .tv domains will go away, too. Of course. Video editing coming to iPhone?With it's impressively large screen, keyboard, and high processor power, it was only a matter of time before demanding programs like editing software made their way to the iPhone. A second, smaller Palm Pre in the works already?Problem: The Pre already has such a vortex of rumor swirling about it that it was clear not everything could have been remotely true. Solution: Rumor that another phone is in the works. That means the rumor-capacity of the device has just doubled. Apple Media Pad?Oh, for f@#%!'s sake, people! Not THIS rumor again?! Windows 7 released on October 23?To help the Apple fanboys start their slander campaign, here is a list of historical disasters and world events that you can associate with the release of the new OS: At the Second Battle of Philippi, Brutus's army is decisively defeated by Mark Antony and Octavian in 42 BC; President Abraham Lincoln suspends the writ of habeas corpus in 1861; Lenin calls for the October Revolution in 1917; Odessa Massacre in which 19,000 are shot or burned by Romanian and German troops in 1941; The Smurfs appear for the first time in 1958; President Richard M. Nixon agrees to turn over audio tapes of the Watergate Scandal in 1973. World of Warcraft coming to the iPhone?Why yes, that IS a Blood Elf warrior-shaman in my pocket. Jeff Somogyi is dealnews' Media Editor. He, obviously, has never played WoW or he'd know that Blood Elves cannot be Warriors NOR Shamans. Seriously. See more of his meandering thoughts by visiting his blog: The Somogyi Perspective.