5 Deals You Need to Know Today: These Marmot Jackets Marnot (are not) Anywhere Near Full Price
Getting a Marmot jacket at half off is a lot like writing an effective intro to a roundup of the five best deals we found over the last 24 hours: it's good. Check out this offer and more in our roundup of the five best deals we found over the last 24 hours.
Top Apparel Deal
Marmot End of Season Sale
Up to 50% offThe most important thing you can have in a jacket, besides your upper body, is a good strong name. And here, Marmot provides a bounty: MAMMOTH. SUPERALLOY. HIGHLANDER. Um… WARMCUBE. Actually, I think that last one was also a rejected name for the Switch 2. But! ARES — they have skinned the literal god of war and given you his hide in jacket form! Or at the very least, they designed a jacket with 700-fill-power, which was the metric by which the Greek gods compared strength, I'm told. All up to half off, which is also how I wear all my jackets, due to a special body temperature regulation issue.
Top Headphones Deal
Apple AirPods 4
$100Glue one of these AirPods on top of a soda bottle cap you've sealed up, and you're most of the way to an ad-hoc D-O from Rise of Skywalker. But we won't hold that against them, especially now that they're at their best ever price. They "boast a refined contour", it says here, which sounds a bit like Frasier Crane describing a wine, or at least it did before Paramount cancelled the rebooted sitcom after two seasons, leaving Kelsey Grammer free to go back to making celluloid gold like Money Plane, Murder Company, and his masterpiece, Kelsey Grammer's Frasier Falls Off Stage.
Top Kitchen Deal
Refurb Shark & Ninja Deals at Woot
From $60SharkNinja might be named like a mid-2000s webcomic, mined from the same vein of humor as White Ninja and The Adventures of Dr. McNinja, but never fear: it is the amalgamation of Shark-branded vacuums and such, and Ninja-branded kitchen miscellanea. Wikipedia informs me that in October 2023 they were sued over claiming their cooking pans were heated to three times the effective temperature of the sun, but also only describes that claim as "allegedly misleading", so there's still a chance. In any case, Woot (an Amazon company, lest we forget — and I admit I did for a second there) has a good selection of their refurbished vacuums and ovens and air fryers on offer, so you can attempt to heat them to 30,000°F for yourself. Or just use them as advertised, it's up to you.
Top Garden Deal
Asofer 5x3-Foot Outdoor Storage Shed
$110This is a very efficient shed — open the door, bam, there's your stuff, not an inch wasted. It's really more of a standalone tool closet. But a regular person closet, not one of those fancy closets you used to see on MTV Cribs that were basically the size of your living room, made of solid gold, and housed half of Mariah Carey's shoe collection. And it's a hair under $300 off its regular price, leaving you with plenty of spare change to go hunting for out of print MTV Crivs DVD collections. You need to find out where the magic happens.
Top Shoe Deal
adidas Final Sale
Up to 70% off"Don't miss our final sale," they politely request at the top of this collection of discounted sneakers and sweatshirts and shorts and such. And we won't, I assume, but I think it unlikely that this will be that. They may as well be claiming that they've heated these shoes to three times the effective temperature of the sun. And until it's settled in court — and by Zod I'll make sure that it is — we can't know that they didn't, but we do know this: adiClub members get free shipping.
