The Bronx Zoo offers Naming Rights to a Madagascar Hissing Cockroach for $10. That's the best such deal we could find for this, let's say, unforgettable gesture of love (or vengeance, if you seek to "honor" a past relationship gone wrong). Your loved one (or not) will be sent a unique naming certificate of honor via email.
Not enough? You can also purchase the certificate together with a plush cockroach or box of chocolates for $35 with free shipping. If you're feeling especially generous, you can bundle all three items for $50 with free shipping. Orders placed by February 1 are guaranteed to arrive by Valentine's Day.